It has been quite a while since last I wrote here at my blog. Sorry about that, but life sent me on a detour and had other missions in mind for me to work on. It has been a great deal of work and definitely still continues. Being part of what life is all about, it will probably keep on up until the end as we are never finished working on ourselves so that we may keep growing and expanding as our changes occur. It is indeed quite the journey.
Not only are times very difficult right now for me, that situation is compounded by the state of upheaval and confusion in the world as well. Part of this spiritual journey that began in earnest in 2012 was for all of us to find a spot to settle in and BE as the turmoil increased around us and we were called upon to hold the light for the world. I found it and fell in love with it, and yet right now I am about to lose it and at a time when the pressure in the world is truly about to explode and reality will wobble and many will be lost wondering where to go, who they are and how they will survive. Chaos in other words. It is inevitable and it is soon to be upon the world I am afraid. We know in our hearts that all the familiar must fall away clearing space for the new world we are creating to take root.
I am finding it very difficult to find trust and belief that all will be well as such deep fears about my well-being try to drown me. I am clawing my way up to the surface to catch a breath and hopefully survive this struggle. Not only am I about to lose my house with no place to go to, in just a few months I will no longer have a penny to my name and that terrifies me. I am far older now where jobs are not plentiful and I should be retired. Not having worked since my early 30’s my work experience is zero for a resume, but my life experience is overflowing. How does one make a job out of that I ask? I deeply wanted to have my counseling career up and running by now so I could survive on my own and feel good about myself, but without money to advertise it is impossible to get started in the first place. I have exhausted all ideas as to how to find finances to survive another year on so I can cement my career and keep moving forward, but that is not happening. In fact all doors are slamming in my face.
I am baffled by this resistance I am up against. If I just wanted money to live off of I could understand Creator wanting me to face working and grow from that and would close doors to me to force that upon me, but I wanted the money to not only to survive on for another year, but more importantly so I could be free to secure my career and at the end of that year be self-sufficient and hopefully help those around me in need of support in finding their way into the new world emerging. There are many sleepers still oblivious to what is taking place in the world and they will need help more than ever when things really start to fall apart. But alas! I cannot figure out a way to secure funds to create this dream. Doors keep slamming in my face and I know deep within it is for a reason, but what reason? Every avenue I have gone down to discover my true purpose right down to my latest search through hand print analysis has told me I am meant to be a healer. I know that, I feel it and sense it and yet I am being kept separated from that life purpose. I keep asking why but I hear nothing, I feel disconnected from my soul at the moment.
I have Lyme disease and being alternative, I chose to NOT take antibiotics and so I have instead been zapping the Lyme using frequency and it seems to keep things in check and I am able to function okay. I am wondering, however, if the constant bombardment of a frequency meant to kill Lyme is throwing off my own frequency and causing the disconnect. Who knows. I can’t figure it out. I kind of feel like I am going through life deaf, dumb and blind right now. It is a very strange feeling. Perhaps I am being thrown off by the chaotic frequency of the planet right now. I am an empath so it would not surprise me.
So why is she writing all this you ask? I guess to try an explain where I have been all this time and why, not to mention sharing these feelings lightens my load somewhat. It is a very strange time right now for the world. One can feel the energy of the people venturing forth and taking a new turn in their lives as they become more and more aware of the truth that we have been deceived mightily by the few who wish to control us and use us so that they may profit. It is a cruel and devastating truth that sleepers must painfully wake up to. I wanted to be there for them but somehow I guess that is not meant to be? I am not sure. All I do know for sure is that I must somehow find a way to trust the process despite my fears of being alone and adrift without a compass or direction or an income. That is the biggest lesson of all for me to learn.
Thank you for being a part of World Metamorphosis and sharing this journey with me. It has been a great pleasure to share with you over the years when I was once One World Rising and I hope I can continue wherever I end up next. May we all stay close together and be support to one another. The journey we have all been on has been long and many times difficult, but it is our mission to hold the lantern of light in this dark tunnel as we feel our way towards freedom. Bless you all and remember always to BE LOVE! Keep your heart open..
Blessings to us all,