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I have a very contentious relationship with money and I don’t think I am alone in feeling this way. I grew up hearing the old saying “Money is the root of all evil” and I assumed there must be merit to it. Then I hear another side in my head saying ” No, it’s not the money, it’s what people do with the money that determines whether it’s bad or good.” Well yes, I believe that up to a point. I think many people fail to see how the influence of money affects us all, we just aren’t conscious of it. Then again we have to add in the fact it affects everybody differently. True again. Now comes the but….BUT, do we REALLY see and understand how it influences our lives?

I’m going to go out on a limb here and reveal painful facts about my life and it scares the hell out of me, but I want to make a point and hope others can see what I am talking about. A quick overview then. I grew up in a physician’s home, it was comfortable and I never remember wanting for anything ( except being loved & accepted for who I was). We were not excessively wealthy by any means, but money was no object lets just say, so I became accustomed to living a certain lifestyle. In 2008 when our corrupt government created the financial crisis that wiped so many people out, I lost a good portion of the money set aside for me to live on. I was in a panic. Because of my inability to work I had depended on that money to survive and had no way to get more if it ran out.

Well, run out it did two years ago. Like a sudden slap to the face I went from living comfortably to not having a cent and now I had to depend on the Government to help me survive. Humiliating is not a strong enough word to describe how I felt about the situation I now found myself in. I carried all the blame and shame for where I now found myself and yet, it wasn’t my fault. Now I planned my outings into town to cover everything I needed to do in one trip to save on gas. I don’t go out and be with people because that involves more driving(gas) and now my budget was very tight. Suddenly I could no longer do all the various things I once took for granted. I struggle to live the lifestyle I have always lived, having to buy my supplements that cost a fortune, but my health is important to me. I struggle to try to continue to eat healthy(organic) but it costs so much money now. I was suddenly getting a bitter taste of reality in my mouth.

When I watched tv I began to notice things I never saw before. Like all the shows that revolve around wealthy living, ads that cater to wealth, products that cater to wealth. You DON”T realize it until you live it. This is what I was finding out the hard way. I see ads everyday for buying gold to protect your money, really? How many people are wealthy enough to buy up extra gold? Most can’t even pay their bills. We don’t even see what we see. Like that old saying ” walk a mile in my moccasins”. Why must we experience something to see and understand it? There must be a reason for this. I guess many people live by the adage “It will never happen to me” and so no thought is given to that subject. But it can happen, it may happen, it did happen to me. Humanity needs to find a way to fill itself with enough compassion so we can understand more and empathize. We should not have to experience something in order to feel it and understand it.

It has been a rude awakening for me and I see the world so differently now. I see how we shut others out by their class, their race, their financial status etc. We judge and we get caught up in thinking the more we have the better people that makes us, the same for money. When you have money you don’t see anything outside of that orbit. It separates us, it isolates us, it divides us into the haves and have-nots. People see overweight low-income people and think poorly of them perhaps but ya know, they don’t have the money or the luxury of eating well. Not only can they not afford it, they don’t have good grocery stores in their neighborhoods. People then say well its their fault for being so violent and aggressive, but how can anyone expect them to act any less when they have so little and their hope is dead? We are well fed and so we don’t see, we don’t live in their neighborhood. That world is not a part of ours and therein lies the problem.

And so the new iPhone came out on the market today and that is all you hear on the tv. How many people have $1000.00 to buy one?  Yet another toy for the wealthy that furthers the divide between us. All that constant chatter about all its new features and yet so many will never own one causing a deeper feeling of “how come I can’t have that too?”  It is so insidious we don’t even see it. I didn’t see any of this until I found myself walking in the moccasins. We are oblivious to so much of life around us I worry if we are going to finally notice. I sure hope so. I wouldn’t wish this way of living on anyone but you gotta do what you gotta do. What I hope most is that we open our eyes and pay closer attention. Make it a challenge to watch the shows or ads and catch the messages being pumped out. Once you take notice, everything changes and there is no turning back. Once you see you can’t unsee it.

Blessings to all,